Don’t be afraid of failure… they say. Yeah right. Like it’s so easy to do.
I think it’s important to question the motives behind our feelings. Especially when that feeling is fear.
Why are we afraid of failing? Why does it matter if I fail or succeed? Are we afraid of failing, or are we afraid of other’s perception of us if we “fail”?
If you are like me… you are afraid, maybe even terrified not so much of failing in itself but of the latter.
Our ego has a way of terrifying us. Even before things even occur. We anticipate the “what ifs”. And get overwhelmed for no reason.
Ask yourself honestly. What would happen if you fail at whatever you are working on right now? It could be a school application, a job, a new business venture, a relationship. Anything.
Why are you afraid of failing? What would the consequences be if you don’t succeed?
Think of the worse that could happen. Do you think you would survive? Or would the shame from not being perfect consume you?
Now, think about this… Are other people walking in your shoes? Do they know the effort is taking? Will their perception of you change who you are?
So then, why do we care about what other people think?
Here’s another interesting point… do people really think you failed? Or maybe… that’s just your idea of what you think they think of you…
In this case, you are worried about something that does not even exist.
I am begging you to free yourself from the pain of worrying of what the world thinks of you. Stop anticipating and stop worrying. You have got to be graceful with yourself too. You are trying hard, you are doing all you can. If at last you don’t succeed, at least you learned from the process. So don’t beat yourself up. Free yourself up from the pain of pleasing the world around you. People pleasing is a full time job with no benefits. Seriously. Detach yourself from people’s opinions now. Do yourself a favor and let go.
- Do things because you feel called to do them. Not because you are trying to impress others.
- Question your motives often. And reroute your life as many times as needed.
- Do things out of love. Never out of fear.
- Don’t waste your time and energy in things that do not fulfill you.